Credits

The guys came over for steamboat today.
Had fun.
Everyone was damn full.
Oh ya! Went ktv at Home Club before that.
I cant sing unless i m on a high.
LOL SCARED.

Sch tmr. SJ and WH at my place now.
I am going to sleep.

Everyone deserves to be happy.

I am so dazed and stoned nowadays.
I wanted to cook instant noodles just now.
Opened the seasoning.
Poured it into the bin nd threw the packet into my noodles.
Awesome.
I didn realise till awhile later.
FML.
Oh and I didnt get to see the sun today. Slept all the way.
The guys coming over for poker later.
Yes, some company.

Created a trumblr for my rantings.
This blog will be emo free.
I m doing fine.
Today was more bearable than i tot.
Forgot to go to sch,
went out,
had my first meal after 12am,
and I didnt wanna kill myself for once.
Hope tmr will be even better.

All we want is something to take the pain away, something to make things better, something to make us smile. We want someone to love, someone who will be there, and we want a hand to hold. Not only is that what we want, it’s what we need.

Insomnia.
2 days without sleeping.
Looks like I am going to lose weight for real.

You taught me everything I need to know.
I am a better person than before.
I thank you for that.
I dont know if you said that just to make me give up.
I hope you did.
Because I believe you are not so heartless.
I refuse to believe I loved someone whos so heartless for 2+ yrs.
You are the nicest person Ive ever met.
But you totally killed me with those words.
I lost myself for a moment.
I almost gave up on myself.
It might help, but I swear its doing more harm than good now.

I loved your company.
I loved how we could fight and make up the next day like kids.
I remember all the times you made me smile when I had a bad day.
I will remember the good times we had together.
Maybe one day we will be friends, bestfriends.
Who knows.
Right now, I will listen to you.
You wanted me to leave so badly.
I will move on.
I will continue to try.
I still dont know the reason.
But I dont think you want to tell me.
Maybe 1 day you will.
Right now I just have to live with the fact that you are gone.
I am not sure what made you decide to leave
but I really love you.
Thank you for the amazing 2.5 yrs.
You will always be my baby.

And you!
Thank you so much for coming over.
I might be dead if you didnt.
Thank you for knowing I did not had dinner.
Thank you for buying my fav chicken rice.
Thank you for listening to me.
I know you are hurting too but I was never of any use to you.
I am really touched.
Its great knowing that you are there for me.

She returned my key
and she said, "I dont love you anymore".

My heart broke.
I cant feel it anymore.
I love her more than anything else in the world.
No one understands.
I thought she did.
I am nothing. Forgotten.
It hurts.
It bloody hurts.
But she doesnt care anymore.
I dont hate her.
I hate myself.
I really want to kill myself.
I really do.
Save me. I am done.
I cannot take this anymore.
I am weak. I need air.
Help me move on. Help me live.

Tonight Ive fallen and I cant get back up.

Everyone is taught to look both ways before crossing the street and to talk quietly in the library, but no one ever learns anything that matter. Like how to keep breathing when your heart breaks.

Had a nightmare and woke up.
Feel like shit now.
Why do i feel like shit all the time?
I need to sleep.
Lessons at 8am tmr and theres an exam after tat.
ARGH. I am so tired with life.
No dreams, no passion, no aim, no happiness.
Might as well die. Fuck it.
Concentrate on tmrs paper pls.
I went for china for this.
I screwed up my life for this.
I dont wanna flunk the paper.
But i havent finish revising.
Oh well... i shall type till i go back to sleep.
Doing nth makes me wanna er do smth.
Ah shit. I feel really fucked up now.
Bye.

I prayed, hoped and waited but its the first time for 3 years. I finally realised u dont care anymore.

Hais. Why must this happen all the time?
Anw, HBM is over. Screwed it.
Tdm tmr. Gonna screw it up i swear.
Life sucks. Take Drugs.

Papers will start later today.
I am still stoning.
I have been stoning for ages.
Even the PSP isnt helping.
Ok, i think i need sleep
but.... ARGH
I want to burn all my notes and skip the exams.
Maybe i just need food.
Hais. FML x 9999999999999999
_l_(^.^)_l_
HAHAHAHAHAHA I made it up. Cool shit.


Sometimes,
I wish I had a nice camera
so I can take pretty photos of you
I wish I was cooler
so I can bring you to cooler places
I wish I was smarter
so I can make you laugh more often
I wish I cared more
so you wont ever feel like leaving
I wish I understand what you were thinking
so I can stop you from giving up
I wish I am perfect
so you wont stop loving
I wish we were still together
so that I can be all you ever wanted.

Keep on wishing Chilung.

What a joke. I took a afternoon nap and had a dream.
In my dreams, I swam back to china cos I left your letter there. FML.

Exams tmr. I am not prepared. FML again.

I came home today. Saw my dog. Never appreciate her welcome so much before. I realised even tho she is just a dog, she loves me more than many others and will always be there. Couldnt help but feel happier. But i realised smth, shes going to die someday, just like any other pet. Seriously, FML to the max again.

When I started loving her flaws, I knew I cant live witout her.

There are some days when you just have to hold yourself together because there is no one to glue you back together if you fall apart.

Monday blues. Yes blame it on that. Might as well blame the weather too.
FML.
I need to study if not i might really end up dead.
Argh. Bad timing for exams.
Oh, btw, I realised i love ice milo. Those in packets.

Maybe I was just a stepping stone for you to get to that point in your life where you’d figure out what you wanted, or didn’t want. So to prove to you that I love you and all I want is for you to be happy, I’ll walk away.